Learning and Leading in Ministry: Chapter Three

Let it Slide

Learn tolerance.

Many leaders today try to be perfect without being a perfectionist, never understanding that the two positions are poles apart. Leaders ought to set high standards of excellence for themselves, but they need a huge stockpile of deference and mercy for those around them. If a leader’s business does not demand perfection in every area, like accounting or engineering, he or she must learn to live with small mistakes people make. Obsessing on grammar slipups, mismatched clothing accessories or unfunny jokes earns an ogre’s reputation for a leader.

Perfectionism causes a significant drain on a leader’s effectiveness. “Our research on micromanagement, perfectionism and leadership reveals that 30 to 35% of executives succeed as managers but stumble when they find themselves in higher-level positions that require leadership and they respond with management. For this sizable group of under-performing executives, the underlying root cause is compulsive micromanagement caused by perfectionist tendencies.” (Hurley and Ryman, Fordham University .) The irony of the perfectionist leader is that by doing every single thing right, he or she does everything wrong.

Do not insist that everyone dot every “i” and cross every “t.” You will end up destroying your rapport with the very people you need to be on your side. In the people business, you have to wink at human foibles and insignificant lapses. Someone has said, “Don’t waste a hundred dollars on a ten cent decision.” Over-the-top perfectionism can become a costly business expense. Learn to let the petty things slide. Becoming irritated over a minor detail today can cause disproportionately huge problems tomorrow.

Even worse, the flip side of majoring on minors means minoring on majors. You may be pleased with yourself in perfecting the minutiae of irrelevant things, but such micro-managing will rob much needed energy from goals that are central to your ministry or business. One of the reasons that many businesses fail is that the owners spend too much money and time on frivolous projects which do not contribute to the core success of the company or do not conform to the business plan agreed upon at the startup. A restaurant owner, for example, can become so engrossed in creating dining room ambience that the quality of the food suffers. Or, a construction company can become so paranoid about employee safety that the owners turn down lucrative job opportunities because they fear the worst. Pastors can focus so much on breathtaking wedding ceremonies that they forget that the marriage is really the main event. Anytime a leader moves the peripheral to the center and forces the center to the side, disaster ensues. Do your main job first. Let everything else fall into place in the pecking order.