Feeding Time

“’Lord, You know all things; You know that I love You.’ Jesus said to him, ‘Feed My sheep.’”  John 21:17

An enormous amount of analysis, exegesis, eisegesis and parsing fogs up this verse.  Let’s let the theologians fuss over the interpretations.  This little phrase, “Feed My Sheep” concerns me. Feeding.  Food.  Eating.  Dinner.  Bread.  Fish.  Potatoes.  Vegetables.  Fried chicken.  Barbequed ribs.  Pumpkin pie.  We don’t need Greek to understand that!  Whatever else Jesus was talking about, He tied it all back to this concept of eating.  Jesus was just telling Peter, “If you don’t feed my sheep, you don’t love me!”  Feeding and loving go together!” 

A mother’s ears are attuned to the particular cry of her infant.  One cry means he’s tired, another means his tummy hurts, another says, “Change me!”  But the biggest cry is, “I’m hungry!”  You can rock him, bounce and twirl him around, but he’s not going to stop wailing until he gets fed.  A pacifier won’t satisfy a hungry baby.  “I want real food and I want it now!” 

And so it begins.  We all like to eat and we can all blame our mothers for making us this way!  Some moms do an especially good job with feeding their children.  When I was growing up, supper time was nearly as sacred as church time.  You could eat breakfast alone.  You could eat lunch alone.  But you never ate supper alone.  If all of us were home, we sat and waited until everyone was at the table.  You didn’t play ball, read a book or talk on the phone at supper time.  You ate with the family.  

So, why did Jesus command Peter to “Feed My sheep?”  First, understand that God likes sequence and rhythm.  It’s in the rhythm of life.  Evening and morning.  Revolving of the earth around the sun.  Spring, summer, fall and winter.  Sowing and reaping.  Waking and sleeping.  Male and female.  God did not intend for His creation to be a monotonous vector into infinity.  Rather, He created us to live in cycles and seasons.  He causes nature to double back on itself in endless iterations.

Second, if we live in a paradigm of cycles and seasons, there are other implications that follow.  It means that you and I will run out of stuff.  We don’t have inexhaustible resources.  We need to restock, we have to be replenished.  One meal isn’t enough.  One harvest isn’t enough.  The supply of energy runs out and has to be built up again.  When it comes to eating, it’s a daily business.  Jesus said, “Give us this day our daily bread.” 

Renewal is vital. “I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.” Romans 12:1-2.

Come back to eat.  It doesn’t matter that the same text gets used many times over.  Boring?  Well, then fried chicken is boring because you’ve had it before.  No, it doesn’t work that way.  We eat the same food meal after meal because we know it’s good!  And, that’s why we eat the same spiritual food so often.  That’s why we keep coming back to the same spiritual kitchen. 

Depleted resources need to be replenished.  You have to return to the source of your strength.  The way we are created forces us back to the source of our supply.  If we never got hungry, we may forget to eat.  Moreover, you need to eat right food!  Jesus said “Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled.” Matthew 5:6. I never get tired of hearing doctrine.  Oh yes, try some different entrée’s along the way, but give me the staples of my diet.  They make me strong and they satisfy my spiritual hunger!  If we are forced to go back to our source, that means we have to live close to the source.

By the way, what are you eating for you spiritual dinner today?

Love Unlimited

“The love of God has been poured out in our hearts by the Holy Spirit.” Romans 5:5 

Valentine’s Day fills the world with love.  Cupid’s wings flutter everywhere you look; roses in a rainbow of colors, chocolates, chocolate flowers, chocolate strawberries, extravagant cards, email messages, engagement rings.  It’s a beautiful time of the year.  Love songs make their way over the airwaves: I Will Always Love You, Whitney Houston; Love Me Tender, Elvis Presley; My Heart Will Go On, Celine Dion; Endless Love,  Lionel Richie & Diana Ross, and more. But, let’s not get carried away. Human love seems so fickle, so easily manipulated.  Romantic love flashes its brilliance, drowns us in saccharine sweetness, suffocates us in flowery prose, and then disappears, leaving only perfumed air in its wake. 

The unfortunate thing about western culture is that many of these expressions of love that float around are untested, untried hyperboles. Some may even be desperate attempts to put Band-Aids on shattered relationships.  Still, we don’t want to upset the proverbial applecart.  We want to believe that it is all true, that the rapturous words in the Hallmark card come from the heart, rather than a wordsmith somewhere churning out poems for money.  But I do know a love that never fails.  It’s called divine love, God’s love, agape love. “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” John 3:16.  

Love must never be taken at one’s word.  It is too important, too dangerous of a concept, too powerful to be embraced without convincing proof that it is genuine.  Think, for example, of the intoxicating power of the symbols of love:  A dozen roses; an engagement ring; the simple expression of “I love you.”  These expressions can release the totality of a person’s emotions.  That’s why it is important to bring love into scrutiny to see whether it is real. “The proof of your love.” 2 Corinthians 8:24. 

Love is the most powerful of all human emotions.  It will make you do what you had not planned to do.  It makes you go into debt.  It makes you give up freedom. 

Love Lifts You Up.  It will lift you into a higher realm than you have ever lived.  There is no higher virtue than love.  There is no greater attribute of God than love. 

Love Changes You.  It will make you become what you have never been before.  Love does not happen in a vacuum.  You will be changed by what or who you love.  Hence, this warning: “Love not the world, neither the things that are in the world. If any man loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him.” 1 John 2:15.   

But the question persists about the limits of love.  How far will it stretch?  To whom will it extend?  Where is your love’s cutoff point?  If love is limited to people you know, it is not big enough.  If your love is limited to your family, it is not big enough.  If your love cuts out people you don’t understand, it is too limited.  If your love leaves out people you think are strange, it is too limited.  If you cannot love the person who has sinned too much, your love is too limited.  

“[Jesus] went to the Pharisee’s house and sat down at the dinner table.  Just then a woman of the village, the town harlot, having learned that Jesus was a guest in the home of the Pharisee, came with a bottle of very expensive perfume and stood at his feet, weeping, raining tears on his feet. Letting down her hair, she dried his feet, kissed them, and anointed them with the perfume.” Luke 7:36-50. (MSG) Judas claimed love for himself but denied it to her.  Would your love be too limited for this woman?  How is it then, that Christ’s love reached you?  Remove the limits. 

Separation Anxiety

“And Lot journeyed east: and they separated themselves the one from the other.” Genesis 13:11 

Why did Lot separate himself from his Uncle Abraham?  Apparently, he did not fully recognize that God blessed him because of his association with Abraham.  But Lot’s real problems resulted from the separation. He left because he saw himself with wealth, materialism, good times, independence from “the Boss,” and freedom to be himself.  But it also broke the relationship between him and the covenant of promise. 

Separation anxiety affects babies when first separated from their parents. Teary and tantrum-filled goodbyes are a common part of a child’s earliest years. Around the first birthday, many kids develop separation anxiety, getting upset when a parent tries to leave them with someone else. Though separation anxiety is a perfectly normal part of childhood development, it can be unsettling.  Also, when married couples have problems between them that reach a critical point, one of the first things they do to resolve the differences is to separate.  Sometimes it works, but most of the time it’s just the prelude to the next step, divorce.  It’s a traumatic time, even if there is no other solution.  It signifies a broken relationship. 

Separation from God. “Behold, the LORD’S hand is not shortened, that it cannot save; neither his ear heavy, that it cannot hear: But your iniquities have separated between you and your God.” Isaiah 59:1-4. Separation from God is not an inconsequential choice.  People say, “Oh, I’m just taking a break from religion.”  One said, “I just want something a little less demanding.”  “Oh, I’m just going to go to this church over here for a while.” Do they preach the truth?  “Well, what is truth, anyway?”  “Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth.” 2 Timothy 3:7. Usually, when people make these decisions, they don’t go to the pastor to discuss it, but to announce it!” But, when you are separated from God, you lose that protective covering, that covenantal relationship.  You become exposed to every devilish doctrine and error out there. “

Separation to God. If you want to be separated, you need to be separated to God. “Therefore, remember that you, once Gentiles in the flesh—that at that time you were without Christ, being aliens from the commonwealth of Israel and strangers from the covenants of promise, having no hope and without God in the world.”  Ephesians 2:11-22.  Sin separates!  Brokenness and loneliness lead to alcoholism, drug addiction, gross immorality, lying, cheating, stealing, fighting, etc. It is Separation Anxiety! But the Bible leads us into a separated life because it is an enlightened way to live!  It’s clean, holy, reverent, righteous.  (Galatians 5:16-21). Let me ask you this:  Do wives want their husbands to go out looking like he’s single?  Do husbands want their wives to act, dress and think like she is not married? No. We respect a covenant relationship.  A life separated to God respects the covenant relationship!  Our allegiance, respect, reverence, and commitment is to the One who saved our souls! 

You can resolve your separation anxiety.  The source of problems starts with a broken relationship with Jesus. You may not experience an immediate overnight change, although it can happen. What you can have is the offering of the hand of God.  We have the ministry of reconciliation.  God wants to take your hand where you are today and lead you back home where you want to be.  You don’t have to come home first and prove yourself.  Just get back into a relationship with Jesus.  Let Him show you what the next step is.

Rules of Engagement

Nearly twenty-five years ago, The Iraq War inundated our military forces with daily chaos.  When an innocent-looking ten-year-old boy may have a bomb strapped to his waist, no soldier could be too cautious.  Fighting men were taught the “rules of engagement,” that is, what is permissible in engaging the enemy.  General Ron R. Vines said: “We continually evaluate and investigate the loss of each life to determine whether the rules of engagement were applied correctly, whether the rules are still valid, whether additional training would have precluded the loss of innocent life, whether additional equipment will do that. What we must never do is deprive a soldier in harm’s way of the ability to protect himself and his fellow soldiers, to make the decisions based on the threat they believe they have on the ground. We will do everything we can to provide them with the best training, the best equipment and the rules of engagement that allow them to operate with maximum safety.” 

We often find ourselves frustrated by the battle of living for God, as though there were rules of engagement when fighting the devil. We pray, read the Bible, come to church, worship, give and get involved in ministry, and yet still seem to have a hard time. We wonder why we don’t have more joy, peace, love and other spiritual graces in our lives. We analyze issues, exegete scriptures, research books and magazines, and talk to othes. Still, certain problems persist. The problem is that we fight the real battle in the realm of the Spirit, not on the level of human effort, human wisdom and understanding. We have an intellectual grasp of the issues, but we will not find comprehensive answers without spiritual insight and power. “For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.“  Ephesians 6:12. We must engage enemy forces in the realm of the spirit. 

One man remarked that the devil would like nothing better than for his prey to deny his existence. Jesus acknowledged their presence without diverting glory or ceding superiority to them. He identified the source of opposition to his mission. Of the religious leaders who resisted his ministry, he said, “You are of your father the devil, and the desires of your father you want to do. He was a murderer from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaks a lie, he speaks from his own resources, for he is a liar and the father of it.”  John 8:44. With this statement and others like it, Jesus laid out the battle of spiritual warfare for the church. 

We ignore the reality of this battle at our own peril. Opposing spirits will not respect human efforts but will flee only as we wage spiritual war against them. “Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.” James 4:7. For example, why do some people become jealous? Or why do others suffer from a heavy heart? Or why do still others fall into adultery?

The scriptures reveal the origin of these conditions. The operative word in each of these instances is spirit. Such unseen spirits often lie at the root of our problems. These elements defy understanding. Spiritual enemies must be attacked through spiritual means. Scriptures learned must be scriptures applied. The devil still trembles when the church falls to her knees. “For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds.” 2 Corinthians 10:4. How can we be mighty through God? There is only one rule of engagement you need to remember—no holds barred! You can unleash the powers of intercessory prayer, fasting, boldly wielding the sword of the Spirit and separation from the world and its influences. We must adjust our thinking from the natural to the spiritual realm. Victory and revival burst forth from spiritual endeavors, not from fleshly efforts.  Soaking yourself in prayer will ignite an inner fire that drives your enemy away!

What Good Is Pain?

The raw material for every writer is personal experience. My raw material for this piece comes at the courtesy of raw pain. Back pain. Pain that, in one nanosecond, lunges from dull ache to intense stabbing; that spreads from vaguely regional to precision locations; that makes itself heard from low moans to blood-curdling screams; that finds relief only in rolling around on the floor seeking an unattainable position that makes it stop hurting. My bouts with x-rays, spine manipulation, ice packs, hot pads, electrode stimulators, injections, muscle relaxers, Motrin, Vicodin and all the other related trials and tribulations, remedies and treatments would bore all but the most macabre among us. 

What you want to know is why. Why pain? What good is it? Why doesn’t it go away when the one thing we beg God for is to make it go away? And, oh yeah, we beg alright. I’m the biggest baby of all, begging God for relief, however slight, and strongly hinting to him that I don’t deserve this. I never quite heard his answer because, frankly, I was too busy moaning and rolling around on the floor. Later, I wondered why he wanted to humiliate me by forcing me to roll around in a wheelchair in front of the whole congregation. 

Pain is bad. It makes us lose time off work. It makes us extremely selfish. We obsess on it so much that we pay scant attention to anyone else. It makes us cranky and hateful. We become big burdens to family and friends. Our lives come to a standstill until we can get rid of the pain. It can get expensive. Medicine, treatments, or surgeries cost enormous amounts of money. Besides all of that, it just makes us feel yucky. It brings out the worst in us. A person in pain is a miserable human being. 

Jeremiah asked, “Why is my pain perpetual, and my wound incurable, which refuses to be healed? Will you be altogether to me as a liar, and as waters that fail?” The prophet must have had back pain. It seems perpetual and defies a cure. It even makes one think that the God who promises healing is a liar. But then Jeremiah makes an astounding revelatory statement: “Therefore says the LORD … if you take the precious out of the vile, you shall be as my mouth.” Jeremiah 15:18-19 KJV. He admonished the saints to take the precious from the vile. In other words, even vile pain has a precious quality to it that must not be cast aside with the pain. 

Just because pain is bad doesn’t mean it has no value. Like anything else that comes along unexpectedly in life, pain catapults us into a brand-new dimension of thought. And the good of pain goes beyond the obvious incentive to pray. Everybody knows that. Far more important, pain makes us reflect. We reflect on all the hours we wasted when we felt good. We reflect on how fortunate we were when we were not in pain. Health takes on a virtue that cannot possibly be understood without the backdrop of pain that sharpens the contrast. Hours of pain make us appreciate the few delicious seconds or minutes of relief that trickles down to us. It also humbles us to know that vast numbers of people deal with far worse pain, whether physical, emotional, psychological or spiritual. 

Pain belongs to this dimension. Even saints have pain. The scripture, “there shall be no more pain” is set in heaven, when time shall be no more. Until then, we will deal with our share of pain, knowing that Christ has the cure to relieve us, and is the cure for us, even while we find ourselves amid pain.

Dare you Pray This Prayer of Repentance?

An awesome scene of national repentance transpired for Israel as recorded in the book of Nehemiah.  For the first time since the days of Joshua, they gathered together by thousands.  Men who represented their tribes stood at the gates and prayed, confessing the sins of their fathers and their own sins. They repented deeply. Repentance sets the moral stage for everything else to happen.  In fact, without the prayer of repentance, the people would not understand their captivity, or why this event was sacred.  Can you pray a Nehemiah prayer today? 

God, forgive us who are elderly among us for all our sins. In our loneliness and isolation, we have forgotten your companionship. We worry because we’re scared of the future.  We worry about insurance, Social Security and pensions so much that we fail to pray and trust you. Forgive us for paying more attention to ourselves than others.  We need to reach out to others, to actively pray with others, to intercede for others, to sit down and counsel with others about your Word.  We live too much in the past, forgetting that you are a God of the present. We base our relationship with you too much on what used to be instead of what is. Give us new strength to pray, to worship, to rejoice, to lead, to teach. 

Forgive us who are in the prime of our lives. We are too driven by covetousness and greed.  We neglect our families to make more money.  We pay too much attention to accumulating things. Forgive us for being too tired to come to church, but never to go to work. Forgive us for criticizing, gossiping, lack of prayer, not reading the Word, and not living conscientiously. Forgive us for not tithing, for lack of compassion, for silence at wrongdoing, for failing to witness, for not doing your will, not teaching, not participating, not lifting others up, not submitting to spiritual authority. Help us to recommit ourselves to you, to remember why we’re saved and living for you in the first place. Help us to love you, our families, our brothers and sisters in the Lord like we should. Lift us up above cars, clothes, homes, gadgets and trinkets, to revere you. 

Forgive us who are still young people. Forgive us for hurting other kids because we don’t like them, or we think they’re stupid.  Forgive us for going along with the crowd, even when we know it’s wrong, because we want to fit in, for hate, spite, lying, and instigating trouble. Forgive us for using profanity and thinking it’s funny; for making lewd and destructive comments about others, for speaking against those you have set over us. Forgive us for piling on with insults until we drive people away. Forgive us for overlooking the weak, the hurting, the new kid, the scared, the timid, the shy, the less talented, those who aren’t as good looking as we are. Forgive us for making everyone believe that we’re ok when, underneath our exterior we know we’re not. Forgive us for being too intimidate to worship, thinking it’s not cool to love the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords.  Help us to love you again.  Help us to forgive each other.  Erase the rage, the hatred, the arrogance, the pride, the attitudes. 

Lord forgive us all for prejudice, pride, resentment, stinginess, carnality, bitterness, unruliness, lust, lasciviousness and wrongdoing. Forgive us for attitudes of superiority, for spiritual laziness, for walking too close to the world. Fill us with good things; love, joy, peace, faith, gentleness, goodness, meekness, longsuffering, temperance. Fill us up to overflowing with your Holy Spirit. Electrify our worship services with powerful praise and exaltation of God. Let the love of God flow to a lost and dying world. Help us to reach neighborhoods with the good news. Help us to tear down the strongholds of Satan. Help us to share the wealth of the gospel to sinners. Help us to live in harmony, respect, love, forgiveness, truth. We can never be worthy to enter these gates in worship in your temple, but you make us worthy. Forgive us Lord!

Questions for the Judgment

Friday night, December 29, 2006, at about 10:00 PM, EST, Saddam Hussein, the Butcher of Baghdad, was led to the gallows.  Accused and convicted of murdering hundreds of Kurds in 1991, he was sentenced to death by hanging.  Moments later, his dead corpse, unhooded, garbed in a long, sleek coat, hung from the end of a rope.  Some say that the only ones who pitied his fate never knew the depths of his savage brutality.  

There will be a day of reckoning for every person who has ever lived.  The scriptures set forth judgment in a dramatic way.  Justice will be served. Wrongs need to be made right; good deeds need to be rewarded; crimes need to be punished; hidden facts must be revealed. A certain day of judgment is a date on the calendar for every soul who has ever lived. “And as it is appointed for men to die once, but after this the judgment.” Hebrews 9:27.  Many other scriptures echo this pronouncement.  People often deny the reality of things unseen.  They procrastinate, equivocate or take lightly negative events. But, there is a judgment coming. You cannot avoid it, delay it or stop it.  Being a no-show is not an option.  There are no make-up exams.  Results are immediate and final.  What questions will be asked on that day? The Bible poses the following questions: 

Question #1:  Do you have a personal, viable relationship with God?  Do you claim to be a Christian for ulterior reasons?   “Not everyone who says to Me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ shall enter the kingdom of heaven, but he who does the will of My Father in heaven. Many will say to Me in that day, ‘Lord, Lord, have we not prophesied in Your name, cast out demons in Your name, and done many wonders in Your name?’ And then I will declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from Me, you who practice lawlessness!’” Matthew 7:21-23.

Question #2:  If you have committed any sin, have you fully repented and made your heart right with God? “If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” 1 John 1:8-9.

Question #3:  Have you held the Spirit of God in such contempt that you have blasphemed against the Holy Ghost?  “Therefore I say to you, every sin and blasphemy will be forgiven men, but the blasphemy against the Spirit will not be forgiven men. Anyone who speaks a word against the Son of Man, it will be forgiven him; but whoever speaks against the Holy Spirit, it will not be forgiven him, either in this age or in the age to come.” Matthew 12:31-32. This is the most frightening question.  The Holy Spirit experience is no laughing matter.  Revere it, respect it, love it.

Question #4:  Have you spoken idle or profane words? “But I say to you that for every idle word men may speak, they will give account of it in the day of judgment. For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.” Matthew 12:36-37.

Question #5:  Has worldly gain been your priority in life? “If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me. For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it. For what profit is it to a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his own soul? Or what will a man give in exchange for his soul? For the Son of Man will come in the glory of His Father with His angels, and then He will reward each according to his works.” Matthew 16:24-27. 

Evaluate your spiritual life now. How do you fare when measured against the demands of the Word of God? What do you lack?  What needs to be changed?  What amends need to be made? Until the trumpet sounds, you have time to do something about your situation. “Behold, now is the accepted time; behold, now is the day of salvation.” 2 Corinthians 6:2.

Can I Follow You?

“Whose faith follow, considering the end of their conversation.”  Hebrews 13:8 

This phrase that we find inserted into a verse on leadership, “whose faith follow” forms the basis for the question, “Can I Follow You?”  The question does not ask permission, but rather, it is a rhetorical question that considers whether one is worthy to be a leader.  It is “should I follow you,” or “would it be wise to follow you?” 

Horror stories abound of unsuspecting people led astray by the new technological marvels of our advanced times.  GPS devices installed in vehicles or held in hands can make even the most directionally-challenged among us locate our target like a heat-seeking missile.  The problem is that it doesn’t always work so well.  Tall buildings cause the satellite signals to bounce around and create chaos for the devices.  Digital maps uploaded into the devices may be out of date.  And road construction or rush hours can fool GPS’s. 

A faulty GPS is one thing.  But, there are other ways to be misled that cause much more severe consequences.  I’m talking about flesh and blood leaders.  Following a person that subscribes to a variant philosophy or whose integrity is suspect is far more serious.  Take the case of Dr. Timothy Leary who led an entire generation astray by turning them on to hallucinogenic drugs.  His medium of communication?  Music.   Music is probably the number one medium by which the last two generations have been reached.  If you came of age in the seventies or eighties, your music, whether you realized it or not, was inspired by Timothy Leary’s influence.  If you were a teenager in the nineties or the 2000’s, much of the rock music had its roots in the drug culture as advocated by Leary.  A little influence has wide repercussions.  Millions of teens lost their morals, their minds—and some lost their lives—by following one man they thought had the answers to today’s questions.  Misguided personalities have influenced millions of people and changed the course of history and popular culture.  

Leadership cannot be avoided.  It is a part of the human experience.  We need solid, moral leaders who will know the way, show the way and go the way for us.  But the Bible has its own standard for leaders.  Followership, is no stranger to Bible believers.  We trace it back to Jesus himself. He is the One who stands out as supreme.  Peter called Him the “Shepherd and Bishop of our souls.” John called him “Alpha, Omega, the beginning and the ending, the first and the last.”  Paul said He was “the image of the invisible God.”  Jesus Himself said, “If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me.” Matthew 16:24.  

You can follow Jesus. He will never lead you astray or never do you harm. He will lead you all the way to heaven. Yes, He may lead you through the valley.  Keep following Jesus. Through trials and tribulations.  Keep following Jesus. Through times of sacrifice and suffering.  Keep following Jesus. Through chaotic times.  Keep following Jesus. Though earthly leaders disappoint you.  Keep following Jesus. He will lead you to Gethsemane.  Keep following Jesus. He will lead you to the cross.  Keep following Jesus.  He will lead you into a tomb.   Keep following Jesus. But, He will lead you out of the tomb.  Keep following Jesus. He will lead you to the Bethany of ascension.  Keep following Jesus. He will direct you to an Upper Room.  Keep following Jesus. He will lead you to an eternal home on high.  Keep following Jesus.