The most pathetic man in the world, according to a very reliable source, is a preacher who loses his license and tries to re-enter the work force. “Preachers”, he told me, “have an unbelievable ego. They believe that they can do anything when, actually, they are qualified to do little except stand up in front of people and be admired.”
Pretty harsh, and not one-hundred percent accurate, but it does make one think. Preachers do get the limelight for inordinate amounts of time. Feted and spoiled, pampered and preferred, exalted and revered, loved and obeyed, many of them think that life ought to be handed to them on the proverbial silver platter. They hear the word “no” so seldom that they don’t seriously consider that they could be turned down for anything.
Some of you may be saying, “Who is this guy? I’d like to get the job he just left. All I deal with are disgruntled saints and tough old birds who couldn’t care less if I lived or died!” The fact is, however, that most people in the average church congregation have great respect for the ministry and they love their preacher. That is a remarkable testimony to all the truly great men who have served as pastors for Pentecostal congregations over the past eighty-plus years in the Apostolic movement.
All of us, of course, have an ego. Without it, we would have no personality. Our ego is our sense of self, our personal assessment of our own worth or esteem. Psychologists have identified the male ego as having a much greater force than the female ego.
In my observation of the church and organizational world over the past thirty-five years, most preacher-problems may be traced back to one root source: an overblown ego. Preachers who fail to rein in their egos stumble into deep ditches of heartbreaking sin and career-ending transgressions. Be careful of your ego.
It’s so predictable. Preachers who end up in self-destruction never want to talk about their problems while en route to their demise. They disdain the offer of help. They seldom seek advice or counsel, mainly because they don’t think anyone can tell them something they don’t already know. Many times they actually think they can get away with indiscretions or even transgressions because they are smart enough to avoid the pitfalls and clever enough to sidestep inquiries.
This is where you can stop reading. You already know what I am going to say, and it applies to all those dim lights out there whom only God knows how they got a license in the first place.
If you do read on, you must fully and humbly accept the premise that you are capable of failure—and not just technically or theoretically speaking either. I mean that you can see the very real faults and inconsistencies in yourself as potential nemeses that can bring you down. This admission does not malign your confidence or your self-esteem. It does, however, keep you face-to-face with reality. We need to remind ourselves that any successes we have flow directly from the providence of God. They are not a function of intelligence, talent, wealth or any other humanly generated quality. Whenever we mistakenly believe that our own brains, looks and/or abilities made it all possible, we are already in trouble.
Moral failure begins with ego. I have heard all the purported reasons why ministers have fallen into sexual sins. Some blame it on their spouses. Others say that a certain woman set her sights on them and pursued them until they fell. Others believe that they were victimized by their own charms…they were just so incredibly hot that the opposite sex couldn’t resist them! From oversexed to under-serviced, from under-appreciated to over-criticized, from too charming to too caring, transgressors in the clergy have said almost anything to justify their wrongdoing.
The real culprit is not a man’s libido, but his ego. One of these failure scenarios begins to develop subtly when the preacher sees himself as a pretty wonderful person and he believes that his wife does not really appreciate his greatness. He becomes increasingly offended by her lack of awareness of who he is. About that time, another woman compliments him on his sermons, his pastoral abilities and his leadership in general. She says that he is so understanding, so wise, and so strong. She wishes her husband had a fraction of his qualities. A steady diet of this kind of ego-stroking often proves too much for an ego-driven man.
Yet another common scenario takes place in counseling with a woman who is inundated by problems, the worst of which is a rotten marriage. The preacher/counselor confuses his role as a facilitator with the sense that he, himself, is her savior. An unchecked ego causes him to cross the line to provide her with comfort and security and he becomes intimately involved with her. Even though his feelings may not arise from arrogance or conceit, his transgression is nevertheless ego-based.
Some preachers’ egos need little encouragement. An individual like this may indeed possess superior skill in several areas, but his opinion of himself is inflated beyond temperance. Unfortunately, when ego lacks the seasoning of humility, a preacher believes that he can do no wrong, and he fails to judge himself by righteous standards. He makes exceptions for his own sins, as though he owned an entitlement for indulgences that others do not have. Either he feels the good he does makes up for his indiscretions or else he believes the heavy load he carries buys the right to moral lapses.
Leadership crises begin with ego. The catch-22 here is, of course, that leadership requires a strong ego. Without it, leaders would neither seek nor accept their role in the first place. Ironically, the very thing that qualifies the leader to lead is the thing that threatens his or her leadership the most. We’re talking about the difference between confidence and cockiness; between charting the course and controlling peoples’ lives; between being an overseer and becoming a dictator.
I have seen it happen too many times in too many places. In the typical scenario, a leader feels he is being disrespected by either the tepid response or a disagreement of his followers. Rather than holding a private meeting with the parties involved and working things out, he erupts with a verbal assault against his opponents from the pulpit or some other open forum, and usually everyone knows who he is talking about. He does not permit questions, advice, changes or other forms of tampering with his ideas. Compromise has no place in his vocabulary. Once he says “God told me…” it’s basically all over.
People respond to genuine love, care and concern. They want their leaders to be sensitive to their needs and feelings. They will submit to unusually strong discipline and high expectations to the leader that really loves them. The leader with an inflated ego, however, demands that people love him, care about him and demonstrate their concern for him. He demands that they be sensitive to his needs and feelings. He will use tactics of fear, intimidation, public embarrassment and authoritative control over the lives of his followers if he so desires. Truth be told, many of these situations actually rise to the level of spiritual abuse and often create dysfunctional congregations.
Doctrinal lapses begin with ego. An aberrant idea, a novel approach or some unique angle on the scriptures that a minister stumbles across in the course of his studies often stimulates one’s associates into intense conversation. The prudent man filters his occasional brainstorms or revelations through his mentors and friends, allowing them to examine his ideas dispassionately, unbiased by ego. Any minister who is not willing to subject his ideas to peer criticism or the views of his spiritual authorities suffers from an overblown sense of self importance, not merely some doctrinal deviancy.
A number of years ago, a woman approached a district superintendent in the UPCI with an interesting question. She had heard about a certain minister who preach the oneness Apostolic message at one time, but later denounced the oneness view, claiming that God had given him a revelation of a tri-theistic Godhead. The elder’s response took me back. He told her that he believed that God could indeed give someone a revelation of a false doctrine, but there were some revelations he didn’t want God to give him. He then quoted these scriptures. “And for this cause God shall send them strong delusion, that they should believe a lie: That they all might be damned who believed not the truth, but had pleasure in unrighteousness.” 2 Thessalonians 2:11-12. He informed her that God would protect his Word by weeding out those who did not love truth. This was the wisdom of a proven warrior, a veteran of doctrinal trench warfare.
Great men who have enjoyed immense esteem in the eyes of others have fallen prey to ego. Seasoned ministers have numerous stories to tell about those who have tumbled from high perches when age or circumstances threatened their egos. They felt compelled to concoct some new doctrine, some different twist on scripture or some earth-shaking revelation that would restore their superiority. Invariably, they wound up destroying any vestige of credibility they had accrued in earlier years. One simply cannot handle the Word of God with an exalted self opinion and expect to stay free and clear from false doctrine. Pride feasts on ideas that promise to bring the world to one’s doorstep.
Financial ruin begins with ego. Discovering that a fundamental difference exists between accounting and economics surprises many college freshmen who enroll in one or both of these courses. Accounting concerns itself with enumerating assets and balancing debits and credits. Economics deals with managing resources. Accounting falls more into the math category; economics is a study in human social behavior. I point this out because too many preachers who find themselves in financial hot water justify their problems by citing poor math skills. The real problem has nothing to do with math, but with the decisions they make about the money under their control. Our use of money grows out of convictions, preferences and opinions that we hold about life. Someone has aptly said, “Don’t tell me about your values. Show me your budget and I will tell you what your values are!”
When ego expresses itself in terms of money, it is invariably a harbinger of financial woes. For example, a British writer, Christopher Hitchens, in Slate Magazine (9-1-2008) talks about the way the privileged class thinks about money. “The late queen mother, being driven in a Rolls-Royce through a stricken district of Manchester, England, said as she winced at the view, “I see no point at all in being poor.” The Duke of St. Albans once told an interviewer that an ancestor of his had lost about 50 million pounds in a foolish speculation in South African goldfields, adding after a pause, “That was a lot of money in those days.” The Duke of Devonshire, having been criticized in the London Times, announced in an annoyed and plaintive tone that he would no longer have the newspaper “in any of my houses.” Similarly, a pampered ego in charge of church finances almost always views personal wealth as a ministerial right.
As long as there is money to spend, things go smoothly, at least for a while. The snag comes when a minister’s ego convinces him that people aren’t giving enough. He thinks they don’t appreciate how good he is or are not rewarding him for his time and labor. At this point, a minister begins talking about money every chance he gets, and he steps up the pressure for bigger offerings and greater sacrifices. Coupled with this is usually a refusal to provide a proper financial report to the congregation. Questions eventually arise that too much money seems to be going down a rathole somewhere. Now you have the ingredients for disaster.
Financial problems, of course, can crop up for reasons that have nothing to do with ego. But far too many instances exist in which ministers have driven a church into the ground because of greed, foolish pride and personal ambition. We cannot dismiss ego from culpability.
Overbearing ministerial hubris has no place in church leadership. We may put up with it or even expect it in other professions, but God-called man cannot indulge his egotism without violating the very premise of his servanthood. No less a man than the Apostle Paul slams the ego in unequivocal terms. “For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man that is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think; but to think soberly, according as God hath dealt to every man the measure of faith.” Romans 12:3. The preacher who cannot control his ego does not have God in the proper perspective in his life. His own opinions will carry more weight than God’s.
“That the Gentiles should be fellowheirs, and of the same body, and partakers of his promise in Christ by the gospel: Whereof I was made a minister, according to the gift of the grace of God given unto me by the effectual working of his power. Unto me, who am less than the least of all saints, is this grace given, that I should preach among the Gentiles the unsearchable riches of Christ.” Ephesians 3:6-8.
Thursday, June 7, 2012 at 07:06AM 
I will, with my resignation, sever my pastoral relations with any former parishioner and will not make pastoral contacts in the field of another pastor without his or her knowledge and consent. 
move. The rule of thumb is that no action should be taken that will cause harm or confusion to the existing congregation. 
