“If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away.” 2 Corinthians 5:17.
Once you are born again, you assimilate into the fellowship of believers. Your change becomes noticeable in dress, conversation and lifestyle. You attend church more often, and your life revolves around Christ and the church. Suddenly, criticism and conflict erupts. Sometimes open hostility—even violence—develops. Debate, ridicule, mockery, recrimination, coldness, disgust, contempt, avoidance, alienation occur. You are branded, treated as a stranger, and you may experience expulsion, desertion or disowning. How do you deal with this?
First, try to understand your opposition. There is the cultic scare. (What are you getting into?); the psychological scare. (Why didn’t you tell us there was something wrong with you?); the guilt felt by your family. (Where did we go wrong?); the sense of loss. (They say they no longer recognize you.); they feel insulted. These and many other reasons prompt their hostility towards you. But, your obligation is to remain true to Jesus Christ. Jesus said, “If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me. For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it. For what profit is it to a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his own soul? Or what will a man give in exchange for his soul?” Matthew 16:24-26. In the bible, truth separated families at times, e.g. Abel, Abraham and Lot, Elisha, and Christ’s disciples. “From that time many of His disciples went back and walked with Him no more.” John 6:66.
Solution: Be careful to maintain the right attitude toward your family.
- Pray for them. See Matthew 5:43-48;
- Treat them with respect and kindness;
- Be firm but humble;
- Do not avoid your family or trade insults with family members.
Also, maintain the right attitude toward yourself.
- Keep a rich devotional life;
- Override your fleshly sensitivity;
- Do not fall for subtle manipulation;
- Declare what you believe.
Through it all, be a living example of Jesus Christ before your family. Stay confident of the results of your new life and wage a battle of love.
On doctrinal talks, proceed with caution! Your attitude will impress them more than your biblical knowledge. Love will win out. Do not attempt to win every argument. Win the war! Do not undermine your family. Let your witness be open. Many converts have faced opposition and survived. Many have won their families.
Keep your spiritual supply line open. “But Ruth said: ‘Entreat me not to leave you, Or to turn back from following after you; For wherever you go, I will go; And wherever you lodge, I will lodge; Your people shall be my people, And your God, my God. Where you die, I will die, And there will I be buried. The LORD do so to me, and more also, If anything but death parts you and me.’ When she saw that she was determined to go with her, she stopped speaking to her.’” Ruth 1:16-18. “
When my father and my mother forsake me, Then the LORD will take care of me.” Psalm 27:10.
“He who loves father or mother more than Me is not worthy of Me. And he who loves son or daughter more than Me is not worthy of Me.” Matthew 10:37. (Also, read Luke 14:26-27,33.)
The bottom line is you must look to God for your strength. Nothing is more important than your eternal salvation. If your family and friends reject you, God will fill your life with spiritual companionship that will complete your life!