Back to School
Wednesday, August 22, 2007 at 04:47AM
J. Mark Jordan in Recreational

ckf_back2skool.jpg Random thoughts about fall’s “back to school” ritual:

Did I ever tell you how far we had to walk to school?
Let’s pray together every day before you rush out the door.
God’s going to have to provide this tuition money.
This year you’re making your own lunch.
The kids who shouted for glee when school let out actually want to go back?
The old clichés about the “summer flying by” start flying by.
And more clichés about kids outgrowing last years clothes.
Sticker shock at the price of those awful new clothes.
Are you actually going to wear those shoes to school?
Don’t tell me that’s the new hair style?
Who’s gone; who’s back; who’s changed?
Why do you wait until we’re halfway there to tell me you forgot your homework?
Have you seen the new teacher?
The principal is just like he was last year.
No, they’re not serving taco boats every week.
Corporal punishment is not a military officer.
What’s this new fee all about?
Now this year, you’re going to hit the books hard!
No wonder…it’s all that sugar for breakfast.
I want you on the honor roll every quarter.
Do you expect anyone to read that chicken-scratching?
Shall we let Junior drive the car to school?
I don’t want you sitting next to you-know-who!
It’s time you earned a few more of those trophies.
In bed by nine every school night. Okay, ten.
Would you believe they just started construction on this road?
If you get in trouble at school…
You’re developing character when the teacher picks on you.
Let’s pray again for God to provide that tuition money.
Last year’s lunch box is perfectly fine.
The new kid said what in chapel service?
What happened to those 579 pencils we bought you last year?
If you stay home because of that, I’m not writing an excuse for you.
Tell the principal, “No more snow days!”
I don’t care if we are late; I have to stop and get gasoline.
If everyone jumped off the cliff does that mean you have to do the same?
No, you can’t go out to eat Sunday night.
Yeah, I think we can cram one more kid into the car.
Next time you get a detention, you’re walking home.
How did you do that to your brand new pair of pants?
Did I mention that God was going to have to provide money for tuition?

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